I Never Get Drunk Now

 I never get drunk now

I never get drunk nowadays. Not after that night. I had never been drunk before, in fact I was a bit of a nerd. Despite being, I think, fairly decent looking I'd never had any success with the girls, the one or two I'd tried to flirt with had just laughed at me and that had destroyed my confidence. I never got asked to parties or anything. I mean who'd want a nerd at their party so I don't suppose I'd got used to alcohol. But then there was this free evening of drinks at Uni. A group of us in our year had helped in testing a new computerised learning program and as a reward we got a free wine tasting. This was in the second year of my time at Uni. There were these girls and they kept asking about how much I knew about wine and getting me to drink glass after glass - not that I knew anything about wine, but I was flattered by the attention. I suppose in retrospect they were deliberately amusing themselves by getting me to drink too much, but I didn't realise it at the time.

In the end though I drank so quickly that I got first tipsy, then inebriated and finally stupidly drunk. I tried not to make a fool of myself, though I suppose I did, and left staggering slightly at about ten at night to walk home through the park.

It was late at night by then, maybe ten o'clock, and I sat down on a park bench finding it a bit difficult to get my legs going. It was a warm July night and I decided to rest a while until the effects of the alcohol wore off. I lay on my back and closed my eyes...

I was in a Turkish harem, lying on one of those long couches or chaise longues you always see depicted in harem pictures. I was dressed like a sort of eastern potentate and naked slaves were fawning on me. I was some sort of important person.

One of the girls spoke. She had the sweet honeyed voice of Melissa. I had always rather fancied Melissa because she was clever and sexy and everything I wasn't.

"What a temptation'" she said.

"I say we take his pants off," said a second girl.

and she had Alice's cheeky, naughty, sexy laugh.

And the two girls unfastened the waist of my silken Turkish pantaloons and slowly pulled them down and slid them over my feet.

I smiled at them. Being stripped by Alice and Melissa. It was my idea of bliss.

Then a third voice intervened with the authoritative tone of Judy. She was always the leader. Th one who gave the orders and expected to be obeyed.

"Don't stop there, Girls," she said, "Strip him naked. Completely naked."

And they did. The girls slowly undressed me, caressing my bare skin as they did so. It was delightful, it was pleasurable, their delicate hands gently fluttered over my flesh until I too was indeed completely naked. Then they toyed with my delicate parts pleasuring and caressing them, then strangely I could feel a cool breeze on my bare skin, the chaise longue was no longer comfortable, it dug in my back. The girls had gone, there was a loud noise like a dog barking and suddenly my eyes were open...

Bugger! It had all been a dream. Why do you never know when you are dreaming even when the dream is so bizarre. I remembered immediately where I was because I was looking up at a clear blue sky. I was in the park; I must have slept for hours as it was now light - although it got light at about three in the morning at those latitudes. The bench was digging in my back, and I could feel the cool breeze on my bare skin. My bare skin! I looked down in horror. I really was stark naked. My clothes were nowhere to be seen. I looked down at my penis. Oh My God. I'd been sleeping in the open, on my back stark naked, with my penis on view. What if somebody had seen me.

Then the awful truth struck. Somebody, or indeed bodies, had seen me. The ones who had stripped me naked and taken my clothes away.

I looked round hurriedly. There was nobody to be seen. The park was deserted. I jumped up, put my hands over my privates and ran to take sanctuary in the bushes. Whatever was I to do!

*****

Why did we do it? You're going to ask. And why pick on him? The answer I supposes is 'because we could'. And because he was a nerd, and nerds deserve it.

From our vantage point across the lake in the park we watched the Nerd as he woke up. It was so funny to see him suddenly realise he was naked and then scamper off into the trees trying to hide his cock and balls with his hands, his bare behind still stripy from the slats on the park bench.

"Perhaps we had better go and help him," said Alice.

"No way," ordered Judith, "he's going to provide us with more fun yet!"

I mean we would never have stripped him if it hadn't been for Judith. When we came across him lying there dead drunk I'd only suggested debagging him. It had been Judith who had egged us on to strip him down to his underpants. Well we weren't going to go any further, but she took out a pair of nail scissors. She looked at us and winked.

"Shall I?" She winked.

It seemed such a funny idea we nodded.

Carefully she took hold of the side of his underpants and cut through, then the other side. After that they just fell off leaving him completely in the nude. How he didn't wake I don't know.

I must say we'd expected him to be rather underendowed. I mean what would you expect of a nerd, but in fact he had quite impressive balls and a very impressive cock . We looked at them and started giggling. It seemed rather funny to be standing there in the park ogling a cock!

"Now for some fun," said Judith.

"What sort of fun?" I asked.

"Oh, a naked man hunt," she replied, with a wicked grin on her face, "let's go and hide and watch what happens when he wakes up.

****

I peered out from the bushes. What on earth was I to do? To get back home I'd have to get through the park, down the main road, across another park, through some side streets, then into my street. Then... Oh no I didn't have my key even. I'd have to ring the bell and get my landlady to let me in. Most of the students shared flats but I never found anybody to share with me and lived in digs. Mrs Templeton was a buxom forty something. She wouldn't be shocked she would be... Oh my God. Naked in front of Mrs T - it didn't bear thinking about.

I peered out again. The coast was clear. I'd just have to make a run for it.

*****

Hidden in our vantage point we watched the Nerd as he crept out from the bushes. Any man with balls would have just stepped out, laughed and walked back, but not the Nerd. I mean he did have balls, and big ones, we could see that, but only in the anatomical sense. And a good job too - that wouldn't have been nearly so much fun.

The nerd crept out, grasping his danglies as if they would fall off if he didn't and looking round like a scared rabbit started scurrying down the road.

"Come on girls," said Judy, "after him! Tally-ho!"

*****

It was the voices I heard first. Girls voices from behind me. I looked round. It was the girls I'd been dreaming about: Melissa, Alice and Judy. Girls from my course and I was naked! They were calling after me, oh my god they mustn't catch me naked it would be too horrible for words. I turned and ran.

I had over a hundred yards lead on them but where could I go. I may say none of us could run very fast. Me because being completely naked I had no shoes on, them because they were in heels. Still I got round a corner so they were out of site and I plunged into the bushes at the side of the road and crouched down hidden. Peering out between the leaves I could see the girls come round the bend and stop, looking around.

"He's gone," said Alicia in a disappointed voice. I breathed a sigh of relief. Perhaps they'd give up.

"Oh no," said Judy, "he's hiding. We'll flush him out. Now which way?"

She turned towards where I was crouched down in the bushes.

"I think this way," she said, "Come out, come out, wherever you are. We're coming to get you!"

******

It had been hilarious watching him run. If you've never seen a naked man running I heartily recommend it. It will cheer you up for the rest of the day. It's the way the willy bounces up and down that's so funny. Sometimes it bounces up and down and sometimes it swings round and round. Either way it's a sight for sore eyes.

I'd never realised a willy could bring tears to your eyes (and not the obvious way).

Now we knew we had him trapped. He was somewhere in the bushes.

"Come out, come out," said Judith, and blow me if he didn't come out.

He crept out the bushes and stood there with nothing on like a frightened rabbit, red faced and trembling.

"Hi there," said Judith, as if there were nothing amiss whatsoever, "lost something?"

****

I just stood there, stripped, red faced, hiding my cock with my hands and trembling with embarrassment.

"Can I have my clothes back?" I quavered.

"Say please," it was Judy, the bossy one, she seemed to be enjoying this.

"Please can I have my clothes back Judy."

"Miss Judy!"

"Please can I have my clothes back Miss Judy."

"That's better, but first you are going to do as you are told, aren't you?"

"Yes Miss Judy."

"Put your hands by your sides then."

"Yes Miss Judy."

Why did I do it? I was naked, embarrassed and she was giving the orders. Of course I obeyed.

******

He put his hands by his sides so we could see his willy clearly. It was fully erect and vertical. I let out a low whistle. Now that it was at full dimension we could see how really big it was. Nearly eight inches I would say.

Judy looked at it and smiled. She cupped his balls in her hand, then suddenly grasped them, squeezed them and gave them a sharp yank. Then she played with the end of his big cock.

"Who'd have believed it?" She said, "we're going to have some fun with that! Now Big Boy,” he went bright red, “I have a fun game. We're going to wank you, two minutes each, if you don’t spout in the next six minutes you can have your clothes back. If you do - then if the girl takes it in the face, she decides your fate!”

You know what? The thought of wanking his big cock gave me such a thrill! I couldn't wait to get my hands on it! And he just stood there naked and humiliated and let us wank him.

****

Why did I let them do it? I was just so desperate to get my clothes back! And I just didn't know what to do, I was so cowed and humiliated I just stood there waiting to be played with.

"Let's milk these balls," said Judy as she grabbed hold of the offending articles and started squeezing rhythmically, while tickling the end of my penis.

I just had to hold out, the alternative was too awful to contemplate - turning up back at my digs stark naked. After two minutes my cock was engorged like a beetroot, throbbing and dribbling, but that was all. It was Melissa's turn. She tried everything, she tickled it, she stroked it, she massaged it up and down, but still I held out. It wasn't just the chance of getting my clothes back, it was the humiliation of orgasming naked in front of three girls. It was too much. I held out until Alice took over. And then it was just too much.

****

I don't know why I did it. I was carried away I suppose and I'd never sucked a cock before, and there it was huge, erect and throbbing. I just opened my mouth and took it right in. I felt it start to pulsate immediately of course and I took my mouth away and let the warm sticky liquid spout out endlessly over my face. It was bloody marvellous.

****

I could do nothing but stand there as my 'water pistol' squirted and squirted and the tingling throbs of pleasure engulfed the end of my cock. I closed my eyes as the electric waves of orgasmic ecstasy took over.

When I opened them Alice was standing there wiping her face.

"That was magnificent girls," she said, "shall we take him back to his digs?"

They left me tied to the door, one end of the string attached to the knocker. Then they rang the bell loud and long. I grimaced. Mrs T was not going to be happy. She was going to pull the door open very quickly and the other end of the string was tied tightly round my bare balls.