Thursday, 7 June 2018

Hey Ho

"There's one thing that's absolutely impossible to remember. Nobody can do it."

I'd been showing off again, to the girls on our course that is.  Not many boys in our company wanted to go on an assertiveness course.  In fact not many people at all.  But I always had difficulty in asserting myself. Always to shy and reticent.  Anyway there were five of us in the course.  Four girls - Monica, Louise, Lucy, Samantha - and me, and we'd met in Samantha's room to revise for the upcoming test at the end of the course.  Apparently we had to sit some sort of silly exam to get our certificates.

I hadn't really wanted to.  I mean those girls were a bit well...  I don't know how to describe it exactly...  Provocative, sexy, bossy....  All those things rolled into one, in their short skirts and their panties.  Well I couldn't help seeing their panties.  When a girl sits opposite you in a seminar in a short skirt you can't help looking up it can you?






I tended to show off in front of them, my knowledge that is, I think they were impressed.  So I'd gone to Samantha's room to join the others.

They had been moaning on about the need to know things.

"It's just a question of memorising," I said, "then you can remember anything.

"There's one thing that's absolutely impossible to remember. Nobody can do it...," said Louise.

What was it nobody could do? I was sure whatever it was, I could do it, but let them chatter,  I wasn't going to get dragged into one of Louise's little games.  She was notorious for them.

"Fuck me!," said Samantha, it's her favourite expression and someday somebody will, "What is it that nobody can remember then Louise?"

"I thought everybody knew that Lucy," said Louise.

I wondered what on earth she was could mean. The value of pi to 27 decimal places? All the elements in the periodic table? No problem for me.  But of course it was nothing as esoteric as that.

"Go on then tell us," said Lucy.

"The names of the dwarves in Walt Disney's Snow White."

The dwarves in Snow White! What was the girl going on about. Everybody knew the dwarves in Snow White. Of course I knew the dwarves in Snow White and I'd never even seen the film.

"Fuck me!" said Samantha.

"Don't be ridiculous," said Lucy.

"I'm not being ridiculous. Can you name them?"

"Well no," said Lucy, "what sort of a twerp do you think I am, but I bet there's plenty who can."

"Do you now. Well I'll tell you what. If anyone here can name all the dwarves in Snow White I'll take all my clothes off, stand on the table and sing the national anthem to the tune of Jingle Bells."

"You never would."

"Want to bet?"

"Come on girls," said Lucy, "one of you must be able to do it. Joe wants to see Louise in her birthday suit!" and they all looked over at me and burst out laughing. I turned red.

"There you are," said Louise, "told you, told you."

She was the sort of girl who could be really annoying, loud, bossy, a know-all. I suddenly realised how I could get my own back on her. I did know the names of all those stupid dwarves. Of course I did.  She'd said 'If anyone here can name all the dwarves', well I was there! She might only have meant the girls but...

"I can name all the dwarves..." I blurted it out without even thinking. That would really give her a scare. Of course I wouldn't make her take all her clothes off, well, I mean, it isn't the sort of thing you do is it? But I would make her sing the national anthem to the tune of Jingle Bells.  Then perhaps I might get some peace and quiet for study. Girls get the better of me!  No way!  I'd show them.

"Oh ho!" said Lucy, "he does want to see you in the altogether Lou!"

"But I wasn't talking about him," bossy Louise was starting to look scared, "I was talking about us.  He knows everything.  So he keeps telling us."

"Come on Lou. You said 'anyone here'. We all heard you, didn't we girls," they all agreed, "you can't back out now!"

Poor old Louise looked like she'd been punched on the nose. She didn't know I wouldn't make her do it.

Lucy turned to me, "Do you really mean it?" she said.

I blushed again. My stupid bashfulness was reasserting itself. I remembered my appraisal, the one that had persuaded me to go on the course in the first place. 'Joe must overcome his bashful nature' it had said, 'He must stand up to the girls'. Well here was a chance to assert myself not let myself be bossed around by girls.

"Of course," I replied.

"Fuck me!" said Samantha.

"Come over here," said Lucy, "up on the table with you both. Shoes and socks off mind. We don't want to scratch the table," Louisa kicked off her shoes and I took mine off and then my socks. Well the girl called Lucy had told me to, so I had to follow suit didn't I?

Louise, looking distinctly nervous climbed up, so I thought I'd better follow.

Lucy cleared her throat as if preparing herself for an announcement.

"A challenge!" she announced, "Louise has challenged Joe to recite the names of the seven dwarves in Walt Disney's Snow White. The loser to strip naked and sing the national anthem to the tune of Jingle Bells!"

The loser to strip naked!, What did she mean 'the loser'? Did she mean I had to strip naked if I couldn't do it? That wasn't what I had meant at all. It wasn't supposed to be a bet I might lose.

"Agreed Louise?" she asked.

"Yes. I suppose," muttered Louise.

"Agreed Joe?"

"Er...  Well I didn't mean..."

"Didn't mean what..."

"Didn't mean I..." my voice tailed away.

"What!  You're not scared of losing are you?"

What if I lost! But of course I wouldn't lose. And even if by some strange quirk I did, I could just walk away. I looked at Louise. She could see she was going to lose. She didn't know I wouldn't make her do it. It would be great to make her squirm. I tried to look confident.

"Of course not," I said.

"So you accept the challenge?  Loser to sing the national anthem in the nude.  What a great bet!"

"Yes.."

A great cheer went up.

"Great," said Lucy grinning from ear to ear. She was quieter than Louise, shorter, dark with oddly blue eyes and a strangely dominant persuasive personality for such a slight thing, "Right you two. Get yourselves undressed."

"What!"

What did she mean 'Get yourselves undressed'?

"Strip down to your undies. This is a stripping bet. You do know the rules of a stripping bet don't you?"

I didn't know any rules about stripping bets. Stripping bets belonged to a different world from the one I moved in. They belonged to the world of those sexy, bossy girls.  This hadn't been meant to be a bet in the first place. I had just been going to make the annoying Louise squirm for a bit.

"Well..."

"Let me remind you then. In a stripping bet the contestants, for want of a better word, both have to strip to their undies. And if they lose they don't get their clothes back till they've paid up. It stops them backing out on the bet. You did know that didn't you?"

"Of course," I lied. I hadn't known any such thing, but I didn't want to seem like some sort of naive nerd, even though I was one.

"You weren't intending to back out if you lost were you?"

"Well...  Er... Of course not."

"Come on then boys and girls. Down to your undies. You'll be quite respectable. Won't you Joe?"

I nodded. Oh no! I'd committed myself to appearing in..... How in earth had I got myself into this mess with one silly chance remark. Somehow I couldn't see a way out. It wasn't as if I was being picked on by Lucy, being bossed about or anything, it was something we both had to do, even if it did mean I couldn't just refuse to pay up if I lost.

But...  Oh heck...

I was wearing girls knickers.  Not that I have a thing about girls' knickers. They're more comfortable.  That's why I wear them.  Honestly.  They support your...  Well your dangly bits...  And they're a bit... A bit... Well sexy aren't they?

Still, there was no way I could lose, so I would explain, they would understand, it didn't matter. Best get it over with quickly. I took off my shirt; I was so embarrassed, I'd just have to take off my trousers and get on with it. Blushing furiously I pulled them down and handed them to Lucy. I was trembling from head to foot. Standing there in nothing but my little girly panties. There was no way out. I'd just have to recite the names and get away as soon as possible.

"Fuck me!" said Samantha when my trousers came off, though I suppose it was an expletive not an offer.

"You're wearing Sam's panties," said Louise, "Well not Sam's actual panties, I suppose, I mean the same sort.  Cotton 'Hello Kitty' panties.  The same sort Samantha wears!"

"They're..  They're unisex..." I stammered.

"They're the same as Samantha wears."

"No they're not.  Hers are pink..." I stuttered to a halt.

"How do you know that!"

"I just caught a glimpse...  Accidentally...  I mean..."  It was no good.  I'd given myself away, "they might be the same style as Samantha wears. With a little kitten on them.  Well she flashed her knickers at me once...  And they did look comfortable...  So I thought I'd try them.  And what about Louise.  She's not stripped down to her undies!"

She hadn't moved. Lucy had noticed this too.

"You are wearing undies aren't you Lou..."

Louise's mouth dropped open.

"...Louise! You're not wearing undies! Well we'll have to let you off that then. I trust you. I'm sure Joe will."

"But..." I started to say, I'd caught a glimpse of her knickers, she was wearing her pink ones, but I couldn't say it...  I couldn't say I'd peeked up her skirt.

"But what?"

"Er... nothing.  Of course I trust Louise," well I wouldn't make her strip would I?

I waited for Lucy to tell me I could get dressed again. But there I was stranded in my girly knickers standing on the table. Somehow I was in nothing but my panties and Louise was fully dressed.

"Well girls, how long will we give him to name all these dwarves?"

"But..." I stammered, nobody had said anything about a time limit.

"Well we can hardly give you all day to answer, can we?"

"Well no, but..." I wasn't allowed to get any further.

"So girls, how long would be fair."

"Thirty seconds," said Samantha.

"Thirty seconds.." I blurted out. That was no time at all.

"I think you're right there Joe. We have to be fair. Thirty seconds isn't long enough. A minute, that's plenty time to recite seven names isn't it"

"Well yes, but..."

"Good that's settled then. Start counting down Sam."

"But..." I didn't get any further.

"Fifty-nine, fifty-eight, fifty-seven..."

The countdown had started. I had no chance to argue further. I was standing on a table wearing nothing but a tiny pair of pink cotton panties well aware that the outline of my penis was clearly visible and I had sixty seconds, no fifty-five seconds to think of the names of those wretched dwarves.

How on earth had I got myself into such a mess.






*******************

A good prank needs a lot of setting up you know. It needs careful planning. It needs a knowledge of human nature, and it needs to be carried off with confidence.

The victim has to be tempted in with an irresistible bait, and once he is in there you snare him in your noose and watch him squirm as first he is deprived of his clothes and then of his dignity.

It doesn't always work. Of course not. But when it does there's nothing quite like having a man by the balls and naked under your heel, metaphorically speaking of course, and digging those sharp stiletto heels into his private parts (still speaking metaphorically, though you never know).

So I'd carefully planned the prank for the last night of our course. The victim was the silly nerd.  Joe the show off.  The only boy on the course.  The obvious victim.  After all he deserved it, always peeking up our skirts, as if we wouldn't notice!

He'd look good with no clothes on.  No point in getting him naked if he didn't - naked and embarrassed.  We'd have him by the metaphorical balls with his privates on display by the end of the evening. Then we might think about the stiletto.

The prank we were going to use was 'The Disguised Bet' and the bait was going to be seeing the lovely Lou in the altogether. Not that there was ever any chance of that! No bloke, especially a nerd, could resist the chance to make a girl like Louise take all her clothes off. So all we needed was a bet that he thought he would be certain to win and then make sure he lost.

A list to recite so best for this. The seven dwarves is top of the list because most people think they know them till they try to remember them, but if he hadn't bitten at that one, we could follow up with Santa's reindeer, or pi to seven decimal places, or the first row of the periodic table. There was bound to be one of them he thought he knew, and the temptation of Louise in her birthday suit would do the rest.

As it happened he took the bait first time. The seven dwarves it was. Then we had to play the switch, when it moves from being a joke to a proper bet. Here a knowledge of human nature, and the natural superiority of woman come to the fore. With the bait dangling before him he is made to stand on the table in his undies and that metaphorical noose is slipped over his balls.

In his case there was a big surprise in store for us.  His love of girly knickers went further than peeking up skirts.  He was actually wearing a pair,  exactly the same as Lou's.  Unisex he's said!  Oh yes!  Pull the other one.  Well I'd be putting the noose round both of his and pulling hard.  He'd be nicely aware of how little they covered and how clearly the outline of his penis could be seen.

And when he was  standing there embarrassed and vulnerable in his little panties and nothing else. Snap! The noose tightens. Sam had been going to give him thirty seconds, but I thought why not give him a sporting chance, he had a minute and the noose tightening round his balls all the time. Metaphorically speaking. You start counting down. There is no way out now. You have him by the balls and he is going to have to try and remember those names.

***********

You know it is really easy to remember things when you are sitting relaxed under no pressure. Under those circumstances I could have rattled off those dwarves in no time

But this was different. I'd made a chance remark about being able to name those dwarves and somehow I'd been made to stand on a table in my panties and been given fifty-five, no fifty-four seconds to remember all those names. My mind had gone a blank. I felt almost naked already. I always prefer a comfortable tight fitting little pair of panties best. Well my privates, their quite...  Well they need good support...  And the panties weren't really that respectable, I was sure the outline of my...  well I'm quite well developed...  must have been clearly visible.

Fifty-three, fifty-two...

Oh no! I'd better start trying to think.

"Sleazy... No not Sleazy, Sneepy. No, no Sleepy and Sneezy! That's it..."

Forty-eight, forty-seven.

"And Doc." There was Doc. And the stupid one. What was he called Crappy.. Slappy..

Thirty-eight, thirty-seven...

The chanting was confusing me. Nearly thirty seconds gone and I'd only got three.

"Happy. That's it! Happy". I'd got four. And then there was... I was getting there now. The names were coming back.

Thirty, twenty-nine.

Plenty time still. I was going to win!

"Gropey, Dumpy..." I said

How many was that? Was that them all? Sleepy, Sneezy, Doc, Happy, Gropey. Dumpy... That was six. There was one more. What was it? My mind had gone blank.

Twenty-one, twenty...

I looked at the girls. They were killing themselves with laughter.

"What are you laughing at? I've got six. I'm nearly there!"

"No you're not," said Lucy, "you got two wrong."

Sixteen, fifteen...

Oh my gosh. Who had I got wrong.

"Sleepy, Sneezy, Doc. Gropey... No! Not Gropey and Dumpy, Dopey and Grumpy. There's just... Just..." I couldn't think of the last one. I went through them all in my head.

Nine, eight, seven...

Slappy, no Happy, Grumpy... There was another one.

Six, five...

I couldn't think, not with that counting. I couldn't think.

Four, three..

I gave up. My mind had gone blank.

Two, one and... Out!

*********

Snap and pull. The noose which had been dangling round his privates (metaphorically speaking) had pulled tight. I had him by the balls and he wasn't going to get away.

He looked round in horror.

"Louise wins the bet," I grinned at him, "are you going to pull your panties down or shall I?"

"No, no please!" he stammered, "I wouldn't have made Louise do it. Honestly. I wouldn't."

Like we were going to believe that, or even if it mattered.

"Would you like me to pull them down?"

Maybe it was a bit cruel asking him to make the choice, but it was fun.

"No," he babbled, "Please no," I do so love it when the victim starts blubbing and tries to escape. There is no escape of course. He is trapped as surely as if a real noose had tightened round his balls and is holding him fast.

"Bashful," he suddenly blurted out.

"Are you?" I asked, "you've certainly gone red enough. But you'll be even redder soon."

"No, no! It's Bashful. The last Dwarf. It's Bashful!"

"That's right."

"Can I go then? I got all the dwarves? Can I go ? Please. Please. Please."

"Ask nicely. Say 'Please Miss. Can I go Miss'."

I do so love it when they beg.

********

I'd lost! I'd lost. And now Lucy said she would pull my panties down and make me sing the national anthem in the nude. But I couldn't. I must couldn't. I was just too...

Then suddenly I remembered. I was too bashful, and that was the last dwarf.

"It's Bashful," I said, "I got it. Can I go please Miss?"

"You can go whenever you like," she said, "the door's there."

I could go! I could go! They were letting me go!

"Thank you Miss. Thank you, can I have my clothes back please Miss?"

"Your clothes? Of course not. They're forfeit if you don't pay up. Don't you remember? But don't let that worry you. You can walk out that door now in your little panties, go down to reception, and explain to the nice girl on the desk why you've got locked out your room wearing nothing but a pair of girly knickers."

"I can't do that!" and indeed I couldn't.  It would be more than embarrassing.  The hotel lobby would be packed.

"Well then. Do you want me to pull your nice little panties down for you then?"

She was actually making choose.

"I tell you what," she said, "you can wrap a towel round yourself while I pull them down."

"Will that fulfil the bet then?"

"Of course"

Relief flooded over me.  I was going to be allowed to wear a towel.

"Please, please, yes," I said

*********

Of course I didn't let him go. Despite his bluster and bravado. I told him he could walk out if he wanted to, but he'd have to down to reception in his panties.. No chance of him doing that of course.

He blubbed and he begged, but that invisible noose was round his balls and he couldn't get away.

He wasn't going to do as he was told though, so I pulled the old towel trick.

"If you like you can wear a towel while I pull your panties down."

And he fell for it.  Of course the words 'while I pull your panties down' are the important ones.

I do so love it when they find themselves standing there in the nude,

He could only stand there shaking, face crimson, knees trembling as his panties descended round his ankles  and I whipped the towel away revealing...

"Fuck me!" said Samantha, too bloody true!

******

So I let Lucy hold the towel round me as I wriggled the panties down.  I only had the silly national anthem to sing and they'd let me go.

Then a dreadful thing happened, a soon as I'd kicked the panties off Lucy whipped the towel away leaving me completely in the nude, they could see everything.  And when I say everything I mean everything.

I'd always been embarrassed by it. It had been such a little one when I was a teenager, didn't start growing till quite late, then it seemed like it wouldn't stop.

And I always keep myself smooth. It's so much more comfortable when you have a couple of hefty danglies. You see that's why I like to wear those tight panties, because they give good support and you need good support when you have a pair like mine. They didn't seem to stop growing either.

*******

I heard the girls gasp. It was the biggest willy I'd ever seen, and I've seen a few in my time, and dangling with them, what looked like a couple of cannonballs.

Fuck me!

He was shaved completely smooth. They were as bald as a pair of billiard balls. And looked as big.

My eyes must have opened as wide as dinner plates.

"Sorry," he said and his face was so red it would have glowed in the dark.

"I think you have something to sing," I said, "and since you've put on such a good show," he went even redder if that was possible, "you can sing it to the proper tune,"

He started off, his voice quavering as he trembled with some and embarrassment.

In the old days, that is to say before I was born, I remember reading that everybody used to stand to attention whenever the national anthem was sung.

Perhaps that was why it happened. I like to think it might have been.

*********

They'd gasped, they'd giggled, they'd roared with laughter. That's the effect seeing my willy has on people. It's not quite the nine inches of legend, but it's not far short.

My knees were trembling, my face was burning, and they were going to make me sing.

I would have to get through it somehow.

And then it happened. It was being seen nude by all those girls. It was the embarrassment you see. It must release some hormone or something. It makes you aroused. I could feel my willy starting to swell, to grow, to stand. By the end of the third line it was as hard as a rock and completely vertical. And I was still only half way through.




*********

His cock had gone up. All the way up. Standing to attention like a mini Eiffel Tower and twice as big. I could see it throbbing as he stumbled through the verse. I could see those two smooth billiard balls starting to contract.

It wouldn't take much.

It would take very little.

It was time to pull on the string round his balls. Metaphorically speaking of course.

Or perhaps not.

********^^^^^^^^^^^^^

I stood there burning with shame as I staggered to the end of the national anthem.  It would have been embarrassing enough, standing on a table with no clothes on, but I could feel my penis was erect and that is the ultimate humiliation.

"Please," I stammered to Lucy , "Please, can I have my clothes back now..."

"Sorry..."

"Can I have my clothes back please.  I've sung the national anthem."

"That was only the first verse."

"But I only know the first verse.  Nobody every sings the other verses."

"Look here.  You lost a bet.  You'd have made poor Louise sing every verse in her birthday suit if you'd won.  You thought you were so clever.  You thought you'd make the poor girl strip naked just so as you could ogle her with no clothes on, as if you hadn't spent enough time peeking at her knickers.  Well, you lost, so now you have to pay up.  Second verse please."

"But I don't know the second verse."

"Well you should have thought of that before you thought up this bet.  Now your going to have to pay a forfeit."

"A forfeit?"

"Of course.  You know the rules of stripping bets don't you?"

"Well I...," I had no idea of the rules, but I couldn't admit to that.

"If the loser fails to pay up, and you have signally failed to pay up, they have to pay a forfeit."

"Yes, of course," what on earth was I going to have to do?  Sing another silly song?  At least I could feel my penis throbbing.  Hopefully it might stop if the forfeit didn't involve the national anthem.

"What forfeit?"

**********

We had debated whether we should try and make him perform for us...  And you know what I mean by perform!

We were going to let him off with the song, but then you see he'd been peeking up our skirts again that evening.  It had been hilarious when he hadn't been able to admit he'd seen Lou's pink knickers.  And it
became clear he made a habit of it when we found that...

"Fuck me!" said Samantha, picking up his panties, "these don't just look like my knickers, they ARE my knickers."

"What!"

"They disappeared the last time he was here, indicating our naked victim.  I wondered where they'd got to.  Unisex my arse!  He pinched my knickers and he's been wearing them!"

That did it!  He would have to perform now.  It was a suitable punishment when all was said and done.

*************

When I'd seen Samantha's knickers just lying there, the first time I'd visited her room that is, I thought she was probably just throwing them out.  I mean who leaves their panties just lying in the bathroom floor?

And they'd looked really comfortable, so I thought - well if she doesn't want them it will save me buying a pair.  I won't get the funny looks from the girl in the lingerie shop...

"I just...  Just found them...."

The girls didn't sound convinced...

"You're going to have to do a special forfeit," said Louise.

"Special..." my mouth went dry.  I was naked.  I was in their power.  My cock was rigid.  What were they going to make me do?  "Special?  What do I have to do."

"Fuck me!" said Samantha.

"And me..."

"And me..." I said pulling on the noose I'd metaphorically slipped round his balls.  Well we couldn't have him escaping could we.

I took all my clothes off, ‘And I mean it…’ I said getting down on my hands and knees.




*******

He performed well in the end.  Although we didn't all choose the same end.  After all a girl deserves a good seeing to after a night revising, and he had the biggest one I've ever seen, and after watching him perform on Lou and Sam I knew I was going to get the seeing to I deserved..  I'd found that regular tugs on the string round his balls kept him at it very successfully.

So our victim had a little treat to make up for his embarrassment.  But he had to have a little final punishment as well.  After all he had been wearing Samantha's knickers.

*********

I knocked nervously on the door at Mrs Carmichael's, shivering with the cold, after all I could hardly get the bus back and I'd had to sneak back the long way to avoid being seen.  I glanced round nervously.  If any of the neighbours peeked out their window, even that time of night, they'd get a shock.

After what seemed like an eternity the door opened slightly and Mrs Carmichael peered round the door.  Her jaw dropped and her eyes opened wider and wider as they scanned every inch of my naked body, resting finally on my impressively erect penis.

"Fuck me!" she said, grabbing hold of my privates and pulling me into the house.

Oh heck!  I was in for a long night.











Decisions

"You what!"

"I've booked the training room for next week."

"Why on earth? Don't you know we've got proper work to do?"

"Actually you told me to."

This was Veronica, my secretary, or as she preferred to be known, business support executive.

"Did I?  I don't remember."

"Because of the instruction from Head Office.  To arrange incentivisation training."

I remembered now. Bloody head office and their stupid ideas.  Well I supposed I'd better go along with it.  It was a good job I had Veronica to do menial tasks like that,

"Well you'd better get on with it then, and stop wasting my time.  Can't you manage a simple thing like that.  I've got decisions to make."

"Well that's what it's about.  Making good decisions."

"Waste of time.  I always make good decisions."

Incentivisation!  It wasn't even a proper word.  Why couldn't head office get on with running the company instead of wasting my time.

“Well whose doing this so-called training then.”

“I am, and there’s nothing so-called about it.  It’s game playing to aid decision making.”

"Games!  I haven't got time to waste on playing games."

"Well you might learn something."

"Pigs might jump over the moon," I said, "what could I learn from a woman?"

"A lesson perhaps," said Veronica.

Still every cloud doesn't necessarily have an ill wind.

"Will Debbie from Accounts be there?"

"All the girls will be there.  Why do you ask?"

"No reason."

Of all the girls I managed in that office, and there were about thirty of them, Debbie from accounts was the sexiest.  It would be a good opportunity to show off in front of Debbie from Accounts.  I'd been working on getting into Debbie's knickers for weeks.  She would be bound to succumb soon.

"No chance there," said Veronica, "she only likes guys who have big ones.  And I don't mean heads.”"

What did she mean by that?  I'm not big headed.  It's just that I'm always right.  I can't help that. Anyway if Veronica was going to the bother of doing the thing I reckoned Head Office should know about it.  I e-mailed them about the fantastic game playing decision making course I’'d devised as part of the Incentivisation programme.  They were delighted.

"And remember to put on your bathing costume," said Veronica.

"Bathing costume.  Why on earth?"

"I explained in the invitation to the session.  Everybody has to do it.  I'm going to incorporate the ice bucket challenge."

The bloody ice bucket challenge!  That bloody thing where you pour a bucket of ice water over somebody.  Veronica had been going on about it for days.  Apparently she'd done it and actually nominated me.  Of course I had nothing to do with it.  And now she was going to incorporate it into her stupid training course.  We'll blow that for a bunch of bananas.  No way I was going to get involved in that!  No way was I going to put any bathing costume on.

So there I was in the executive training suite.  The thirty girls in the department were sitting chatting and ignoring me.  I tried sidling up to Debbie from Accounts in her, was that what they call a tank top she was wearing, and her short tight skirt.

"Hi," I said nonchalantly.

She just have me a look and stalked off, swinging her hips in her high heels. Did she think I had a little one?  Well I'd show her a thing or two.  I always shine at this sort of event, show people what I'm made of!

Debbie was playing hard to get which annoyed me, so I decided to let Veronica know what a waste of time all this was.

"Veronica, waste of time this," I said, well she may as well know what I thought,  "playing silly games when we should be working.  But head office in their wisdom insisted we do something."

"Well I think we might find the girls see something very interesting by the end of the session.  If what I've been led to believe is true."

Veronica plugged her laptop into the system and a big sign came up on the screen.

'Veronica Masterson.  Learning through games.'

Dear me!  What rubbish!

"Girls," she said, "Your attention please," the girls stopped chatting, they never did that when I tried to get their attention, "...today we are going to play a game, a game about making decisions.  Some of you might thing that games are silly and a waste of time," she looked pointedly at me, "but I will show you how making the wrong decision can end up making you look extremely foolish or even worse."

What a waste of time.  I never make wrong decisions.  What was I doing there!

"First," she went on, "for this game we need two volunteers.  You at the back perhaps. Debbie."

"Who me?" It was Debbie from Accounts.  Debbie with the long legs, short skirt and estuary accent.

"Yes you."

Debbie strutted forwards in those narrow heels that made her behind swing.

"And another.  Boys versus girls perhaps.  Someone who wants to show off their decision making ability. And she looked at me."

I knew what she was trying to do.  I was the only 'boy' there.  She was trying to make me look a wimp by not volunteering.  Well I never usually get involved in this sort of rubbish, but I wasn't going to let her get away with that trick.  Anyway it was a chance to show Debbie from Accounts what I was made of.

"Of course I'll volunteer!" I said.

That would show her.

She got us both up on the stage at the front.

"Now this session is about decision making, and in any decision there is an upside, a downside, and a risk.  So, this game for each contestant there is an upside, a downside and a risk.  So, we have a prize for the winner and how shall I put it.  A forfeit for the loser."

"Cor," said Debbie, "that sounds like fun.  I love a bit of fun I do."

The implication was that I was somebody who didn't like a bit of fun.  Anyway, no way would I lose anything against Debbie from Accounts.  Debbie from Accounts was not famous for her intellect, and somehow the notion of beating Debbie from Accounts, after what she had implied about how big mine was, held a certain attraction.

"Yes,  I like fun as well," I said,  for some reason the audience groaned.

"Well the game is quite simple," said Veronica, "her is a buzzer for both of you.  A question will come up on the screen.  First to press the buzzer and give a correct answer wins and..."

"And nothing..." I interjected, "get on with it."

I was looking forward to this.  I could show off my general knowledge to Debbie.  Piece of cake!

"... All right, but I have to explain - there is a prize and a forfeit."

At this point she unlocked a large box and took out a large bucket of icy water.

"The ice bucket challenge," she said, "the upside of the prize is that the winner gets to empty the ice bucket over someone, the downside is that the loser is the one that gets iced."

I was about to protest at this stupid notion, but Debbie butted in.

"Cor, that's great.  You'd have to be a real wimp, a little man, not to love that."

Debbie was implying I was a wimp, implying that I only had a little one.  Well I'd show her.  No way would I lose anyway.  No way would I lose to Debbie.

"Quite," I said, "only a wimp would turn down the offer."

"I need to explain something else," said Veronica.

"Come on...  Get on with it," I said.  Ruddy Veronica, always rabbiting on about something.

"Not so fast," said Veronica, "I said there was an upside, a downside and a risk. You have to risk something to take part."

"You mean like a bet."

"Exactly like a bet."

"Well how much?"

"Not money.  That would be no fun.  You bet your shoes and socks."

"What!"

"Your shoes and socks."

"I ain't wearing no socks," said Debbie.

'Well just shoes for you then"

"That's preposterous," I said.

"Scared are you," said Debbie, "knew you had a.."

"Debbie!" said Veronica.

"...were a wimp."

She'd been going to say I had a little one till Veronica stopped her.  Well I'd show her!

"I'm not scared.  I'm in"

Well, I thought, I'm never going to lose, and even if I did I'd just chuck the stupid Veronica out with her silly box and her bucket,  I could make a decision when I had to!

I took off my shoes and socks and Veronica put them in the box alongside Debbie's heels.
“Right, let the competition begin.  First question.  She pressed a key on her laptop.

A question sprang up on the screen.

"What was the date of the Battle of Agincourt"

I pressed the buzzer.  Well if that was the level of question this would be a walkover.

"Fourteen fifteen!" I announced triumphantly.  Let's have that bucket.

"Not so fast," said Veronica, "I hadn't finished telling you the rules when you so rudely interrupted.  That would be far too simple a game.  Debbie gets the chance of a rerun.  We toss a coin and if she wins she's back in.  It's what I think is called in card playing circles the dog's chance."

"But that's not fair."

"Well you should have established the ground rules before you started instead of interrupting me.  First rule of business that."

"Still not fair."

"Shall we put it to the audience then.  Who wants to see Debbie get a second chance."

A big cheer went up.  Well it would.  They like a bit of fun do those girls.

"Don't I get a say then," says Debbie, "what do I have to do for a second chance."

"Simple.  We toss a coin.  If you call correctly you're back in and if you lose, well there's the bucket and there's the icy water!"

"Ooh!  That's exciting," said Debbie, "I put me bathers on specially!"

"There's just one thing though."

"What's that."

"You have to put in a new stake.  After all there has to be some downside to losing doesn't there."

"What's that then."

"Another article of clothing.  Your lovely, er... Is that a tank top, perhaps."

How stupid could Veronica  be!  She would never do that.  But I'd reckoned without the even greater stupidity of the Debbies of this world.

"Yeah, no probs," she said, "I've got me bikini on.  Quite respectable under here I am."

 I thought of putting a stop to it there and then, but Debbie did have big tits.

"Well go on then," I found myself saying.

"Hark at him," said Debbie, "want to see me tits do you."

"Not at all," I blustered, caught out a bit by the remark, "it's an important lesson in decision making."

She pulled off her ridiculous tank top and threw it in the bin.  You could see why she didn't mind.  She might have had big tits, but she revealed only a modest bikini top.

"Okay," said Veronica, "time to toss the coin"

My so called Business Support Executive produced a coin to toss.

"Heads," called Debbie.

Veronica caught it and slapped in on the back of her hand.

"Heads it is," said Veronica.


Blast it.  Well another round and I'd win again so it didn't really matter.

"What happens now?" I asked, "another question?"

"They certainly do, but first you have to put in your stake for this round."

"Stake, what stake?"

"Your shirt, you've got to bet your proverbial shirt on it.  Let the girls see your manly chest."

"No way," I said.

"Oh well, I that case you lose by default."

"What!"

"That's the rules.  First person to back out loses by default.  There’s a decision to make here,  keep going or lose.  If you'd rather be be iced than take your shirt off it's up to you."

Well, put like that it was a no-brainer.  What if the girls did see my manly chest.  It would show I could make the difficult decisions when it came down to it.  To rather raucous cheers I took off my shirt and put it in the box.


"Okay next question," said Veronica.

It came up on the screen.

"What is the capital of the United States?"

To my amazement Debbie beat me to the buzzer.  I needn't have worried.

"New York," she said, "everyone knows that."

She was quite surprised to hear she had got it wrong.

"Do you want to risk another coin toss," Veronica asked Debbie.

"Yeah, why not."

"You'll have to put in another stake."

"I've only got me bathers and me skirt left."

"She can't take anything else off," I interjected, "it wouldn't be proper."

"Well we're all girls here, except you of course, and if she doesn't mind that, do you mind that?" She asked Debbie.

"Well if I took me skirt off I've got me bikini bottoms on like we was told to wear.  They're quite respectable really."

"There you are then," said Veronica, "she can make the big decision."

"Well all right," I said.

"You just want to see me in me bikini," said Debbie.  To which I felt my face turn bright red, well it had influenced my decision a bit.

She took off her skirt and threw it in the box.  Her bikini was almost respectable.  Well rather skimpy really, but well..  She'd agreed to parade around in it.

"Toss the coin then Veronica."

"Heads," called Debbie.

"Heads it is."

Damn and blast.

"Are you in for another round then?" Veronica asked me.

"What?" I was still getting over my disappointment.

"Another round."

Another round.  Yes of course.  Even Debbie wouldn't stake her bikini would she, when I won next time.  I had Veronica just where I wanted her.  Hoist by her own petard I think it's called.

"Right, yes, I'm in."

"Good.  You can put your stake in the box."

"Stake?"

"Yes, you have to stake something you know.  Another article of clothing."

"But...  But..."

"Don't tell me you didn't put your bathing costume on.  After you were specifically told to?"

"Well I..  I...  I was to going to...  But I didn't think I'd lose..."

"Well you have to now haven't you.  Or I'm afraid it's going to be the ice...  Unless you think your underpants are respectable enough...  You are wearing some aren't you?"

"Well yes..." well they were just as respectable a swimming trunks really.

"Well it will have to be in your underpants won't it.  That's what you get from not following instructions.  I'm sure the girls won't mind,  do you mind girls?"

A big shout of 'No!' went up from the girls.

"There you are.  The big decision.  Can you make the big decision.  Debbie did.  She’s not a wimp.  Are you going to let her win?"

She was right there.  For once she was right.  Debbie was respectable in her swimsuit, I'd be no different in my underpants.

"And she'll have to stake her bikini top or bottom to stay in when I win?"

"Of course.  Or be iced."

Well that settled it.  I could make the big decisions.  Debbie was going to get it.

"I'm in," I said.

Rather than cheers, howls of laughter came from the girls as I stood there in my pants.  I suddenly realised how ridiculous I looked.  Not like wearing a swimsuit at all.  They looked nothing like a bathing costume.  Veronica had got me standing in front of the girls in my underwear, and my pulse was racing, I was feeling like a scared rabbit.

Still it wouldn't be for long.  I'd soon be dressed again, then Debbie would get it good and proper for making me do this,

"Time for the next question," said Veronica.

Up it came on the screen

"What's 16 times 18.”

Oh my Gosh!  Debbie was in accounts.  She did this sort of sum every day.  I saw her finger move towards the buzzer.  I had to beat her to it.

Buzz!

"Yes?"  Veronica looked at me grinning.

"It's er..."  What was it?  I couldn't think.  It was so pressurised.  Ten times ten.  Plus ten times eight plus.  Oh!  What was it again, "a Three hundred and twenty four," I blurted out.

"Oh dear," said Veronica, "what is it Debbie?"

"No idea," said Debbie, "I only do the filing."

"Never mind.  It doesn't matter.  It's 288.  He got it wrong so he loses.  Bad decision to go on.  Time for the ice I think?  Unless you want to bet your underpants for the dog's chance."

"I can't do that!"

"Well I don't know.  They don't leave much to the imagination do they.  But if you will ignore instructions.  But I'll tell you what we'll do.  I have a couple of towels here.  If you ask Miss Debbie nicely she might just hold one round you while you pull your underpants down.  I think the towel might actually be less revealing."

"Yes but..." then a thought suddenly struck me.  When I'd won I still had to remove an item of clothing to go on to the next question.  So this time Debbie would have to remove... "...I've only got one item of clothing left and Debbie has bikini top and bottoms.  Debbie will have to remove an item of clothing in order to go on to the next question won't she?"

"Well yes.  Of course."

"Well, in that case I'll go on if Debbie counts her bikini as one item of clothing.  She can use the other towel..."  The towels looked rather skimpy.  I secretly hoped it wouldn't cover much and I wouldn't be trapped by a trick question again.  Icing Debbie in a skimpy towel would be real fun!

"Well I don't know. What do you say Miss Debbie?  Are you up for it?"

"Me?  Of course!  I'm always up for a bit of fun."

I'd done it!  I'd baited the trap and stupid Debbie had fallen into it,  I knew she'd agree.  With any luck I might even get the towel to fall off!

"Well that's agreed then," said Veronica, "ask Miss Debbie if she'll hold the towel round you."

"Hold the towel round me Debbie..."

"Nicely," I said, "Please Miss Debbie... Would be a good start..."

Well if I had to... "Please Miss Debbie, will you hold the towel round

"Yes of course I will," said Debbie, picking up the towel and holding it round moe.  She'd used the smaller of the two towels.  Just a small hand towel really.  I have a slim waist but it barely met at the side.  Still it probably was more respectable than the underpants.    It was tricky trying to get hold of my underpants in a respectable way.

"Do you want me to pull them down for you?" asked Veronica.

"Well that might be best..."

So there I stood, suddenly feeling very vulnerable wearing nothing but a skimpy little towel and visibly naked all the way up side where the towel didn't quite meet.  Still I wasn't going to fooled like that again.  I'd let Debbie answer and get it wrong next time.  Foolproof!

Still, now it was Debbie's turn.

"Somebody better hold the towel for Miss Debbie," I said.

"Hold on," said Veronica, "haven't you forgotten something?"

"Forgotten?  What?"

"The coin toss.  You have to win the coin toss before you can go on to the next question.  If you lose the coin toss you've lost."

The coin toss!  I'd forgotten all about it.  Debbie always won it so I'd forgotten all about it.  There was still a chance I'd lose...  But it was too late to say anything now.  The coin was already in the air.

"Heads," I croaked.  It also came down heads.

Veronica caught the coin and slapped it on the back of her hand,

"Tails," she said "you lose."

And suddenly, before I could say anything, Debbie whipped the towel away and I was left stark naked in front of the girls in the office.  My girls the girls who worked for me.  I stood rooted to the spot as the howls of laughter echoed round the room.

My hands clamped over my private parts and I stood in the classic pose of the exposed nude male.  Knock kneed, privates hidden, face red, nothing on, cringing.

"But you said I could wear the towel," I stammered, my face blushing scarlet.

"Dear oh dear, you really should listen more carefully.  I said Miss Debbie could hold the towel while you took your underpants off.  I didn't say you could keep it on if you lost.  Thank you Miss Debbie you can get dressed again while I explain what will happen to the loser."

She turned to the audience while Debbie put her skirt and top back on.

"Well girls," she said, "you'll remember when I nominated our loser for the ice bucket challenge I said it would be double contributions if he did it naked.  And you said I'd never get him to do that so I said in that case treble contributions.  Well girls, get your money out.  Here he is naked.  And here is Miss Debbie with the bucket of icy water.

"Debbie you do the honours," said Veronica.

Debbie picket up the bucket of icy water and emptied it over my head.  I shrieked as the cold water hit my naked body.  It was freezing.  I shrieked and leapt up and down, rubbing my skin hard to get some warmth back.

"Very impressive," said Veronica.

Oh no! What with shrieking, jumping and rubbing, I'd forgotten to keep my hands over my privates.  They were fully exposed.  And the cold water hadn't done my penis any favours.

All I could do was try to make the best of it.

"All right Veronica," I said, trying to look a good sport, "Of course I lost deliberately to make more money for the charity," may as well try to get some kudos from my humiliation, "can I have my clothes back now please."

"Sorry?"

"I said let me have my clothes back."

"Oh dear.  You really should pay attention to the ground rules.  You bet your clothes.  You lost them.  You don't get them back.  At least not till its time to go back home.  Even then I might keep cute little underpants.  Get them framed as a sort of memento."

I should have exerted my authority.  Demanded my clothes back, but somehow standing in front of the girls completely nude and soaking wet  I just couldn’t do anything except plead.

"Please Miss Veronica. Please I'll do anything."

"Risk another coin toss?.

"Yes of course, anything."

"...and a little grovelling wouldn’t come amiss.”"

“Grovelling?”

“Yes, perhaps kiss Miss Debbie's feet while you’re doing it.”

“Yes of course, of course,” I went down on my hands and knees and kissed Debbies feet.

"Excellent” said Veronica.  But of course there has to be a forfeit if you're to be allowed another go at the coin toss.  I know.  You've lost all your clothes perhaps you can lose your dignity as well.  You can be Miss Debbie's little doggie."

"Miss Debbie.  The collar and lead."

Debbie produced a dog collar and lead and fastened it round my neck.  I was already on my hands and knees and now I was Debbie's doggie.

Veronica picked up the coin.

"Tails," I said.

"Oh dear," said Veronica, "Doggies can't talk. They can only go woof woof.  Mod your head for heads and waggle your tail for tails".

She tossed the coin up and much to the delight of the girls I waggled my bottom vigorously.

**DEAR READER, AT THIS POINT YOU SHOULD TAKE ALL YOUR CLOTHES OFF AND TOSS A COIN.  READ THE NEXT SECTION NAKED ACCORDING TO HOW THE COIN COMES DOWN.  GIRLS (AND I KNOW LOTS OF YOU WOULD LOVE TO BE DEBBIE) ARE ADVISED TO SIT ON A TOWEL**

*********************

HEADS

"Oh dear," said Veronica, "Heads.  Miss Debbie.  Take your doggie for a walk."

I looked at Miss Debbie imploringly as she tugged on my lead.

"Woof woof," I said, and the room erupted in gales of laughter,

"Oh dear," said Veronica, "bad decision that.  You're going to have to be Debbie's little doggie for the rest of the day now.  Well girls, what have we learned today,". Debbie was parading me round the room stark naked on my hands and knees, an activity which had made my cock go rigid, "three things I think.  Number one, always make sure you know the rules before embarking on anything.  Number two always make rational decisions based on evidence not on wishful thinking, and number three you can see now Miss Debbie's little doggie has really got quite a big cock."

Howls of laughter and there was nothing I could do.  I’'d taken all my clothes off voluntarily and I couldn’'t complain about a course I’'d taken all the credit for.  I just crawled past the girls in the nude while they laughed and laughed

“"Don't you agree Doggie?"

"Woof woof,”" I said, “"woof woof”."

“Good doggie,” said Veronica taking the lead and thing it to the table leg.

Still, it's an ill wind that doesn't have a silver lining.  I got a nice bowl of dog biscuits for lunch.  And at the end of the day, after taking me out into the garden to cock my leg against a tree, Miss Debbie took me back to her house in the boot of her car, well she didn't want a doggie on her nice leather seats did she.

So all in all it was quite a successful day I thought.  Head office were delighted with the positive feedback from the girls about the course.  All the girls had given me top marks for my role in the training.  And I think I got a lot of kudos from doing the ice bucket challenge in the nude.  I nominated Debbie next, but she was a wimp and wouldn't do it naked.  So that showed I was better than Debbie.  True, the girls had all seen my cock, which was a bit embarrassing, but then so had Miss Debbie.  And she likes big ones.  And do you know what?  She likes doggie position as well.

******************

TAILS

"Tails it is," pronounced Veronica, "Miss Debbie.  Give him his prize!"

I looked at Miss Debbie as I got to my feet.  She had a sort of naughty grin on her face as she removed the collar from my neck.

"Can I have my clothes please Miss Debbie.

"Not till you've had your prize."

"Prize?  What prize."

"You'll see.  Just put your hands behind your back and close your eyes."

I was naked, I was wet and I was thoroughly humiliated, which meant I was putty in her hands.  I did as I was told

Suddenly the collar was slipped round my wrists and pulled tight.  The lead was given to Veronica.  I was bound, naked and helpless.  And about to find out what the prize was.

"What's happening?" I'm croaked.

"Say 'Please Miss Debbie will you wank me'."

"Please Miss Debbie will you wank me," I repeated almost automatically.

"Of course Babes," said Debbie, "I love a bit of fun I do."

And before I knew it she had a hold of my cock and was gently stroking it.

I suddenly realised what I'd said.  I'd asked to be wanked in front of all those girls

Debbie gasped as my penis went erect, "Gosh Babes veto impressive that is."

Well girls," said Veronica, "what have we learned today,". Debbie was now wanking me vigorously, "three things I think.  Number one, always make sure you know the rules before embarking on anything.  Number two always make rational decisions based on evidence not on wishful thinking, and number three you can see now Miss Debbie has really got quite a big cock on her, or should I say in her, hands."

Howls of laughter and there was nothing I could do.  I’'d taken all my clothes off voluntarily and I couldn’'t complain about a course I’'d taken all the credit for.  And I'd just asked to be wanked in the nude while they laughed and laughed

And Debbie knew how to wank.  She would bring me to the brink then stop until I was begging for more.

"What do you want Babes?"

"Wank me Miss Debbie please.  Wank me.  Wank me!"

"What is that you said Babes?  I can't hear you Babes."

"Please Miss Debbie.  I want a wank.  I want a wank!" I shouted.

She really joe how to tease a cock,  to build up a head of steam, and then at the crucial moment...

"Please Miss Debbie, please!    Oh. Oh!  Ooooooooooooooooooh!"

My halls contracted and fired, just as Veronica looked over my shoulder to see what was happening.

So all in all it was quite a successful day I thought.  Head office were delighted with the positive feedback from the girls about the course.  All the girls had given me top marks for my role in the training.  And I think I got a lot of kudos from doing the ice bucket challenge in the nude.  I nominated Debbie next, but she was a wimp and wouldn't do it naked.  So that showed I was better than Debbie.  True, the girls had all seen me wanked in the nude to a dramatic conclusion, which was perhaps a little bit embarrassing, but then Veronica had got it in the face so that was a cause for satisfaction.  And do you know what?  Debbie now knew I had a big one. I had to be in with a chance now.







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