The phone rang. Bugger! I was just getting to the interesting bit. You know the bit, where the cop is examining, well more like groping, the breasts of the naked girl and... Well you know what happens. You watch the 'adult' films when your away in a hotel on a business trip don’t you. It’s not as if they specify which film on the hotel bill do they? That would be a bit embarrassing when you claimed your expenses wouldn’t it? If they detailed 'Viewing Naked Strip Search' on the bill, wouldn’t it? Anyway the Agent Whoeverhewas had now got the girl in handcuffs and he was going to... I didn’t find out because the phone rang.
"Room 49," I answered.
"Good evening Sir," it was a girl's voice.
"Yes?"
"This is Fiona on reception. Are you enjoying your film Sir?"
Oh heck! Fiona on reception knew what I was watching. My ears burned.
"Um.. er... Yes..."
"Sorry to interrupt while you’re.. er... you’re..."
"I’m what..."
"Well, enjoying yourself. Most men do when they reach that bit."
Oh no! She'd guessed what I was doing when he got the naked girl cuffed. Well, you would as well. Admit it!
"I er..." my ears burned even more.
"As I said. Sorry to interrupt your er... enjoyment... but there's someone from the police here to see you."
"The police! What! I mean... the film.... I was only..."
"Nothing to do with what you get up to in the privacy of your own room Sir. You’re quite entitled to pleasure... I mean enjoy yourself watching the film. She just wants to talk to you about something."
"Yes... er... of course. But can you give me a minute to...."
"Put some clothes on?"
"Well... yes I’m..."
"Men usually are when they’re watching that film. Slip your bathrobe on she’s on her way already."
Oh heck! The police! What had I done wrong. The police always make me anxious. I grabbed the bathrobe and quickly turned off the image of the naked girl in handcuffs. There was a knock on the door. I opened it nervously. A smartly dressed young lady with blonde hair tied back in a pony tail held up a warrant card.
"Detective Sergeant Pettigrew. Robbery," she announced, "may I come in?"
Robbery! Thank goodness it wasn’t vice!
"Sorry to interrupt your... evening," she said in that police monotone, "the receptionist explained that you’d been... enjoying yourself. Good film was it?"
"Er... Yes," she had me nervous already.
"Not my sort of thing..."
"No, I suppose not..."
"Police dramas... nothing like the real thing."
"Er... no..."
"Anyway Sir. I’ve come to elicit your assistance in a matter of some expediency."
"Assistance?" What did she mean? Why the police talk in plain English?
"We need your assistance."
"Yes, of course Officer..."
"Detective Sergeant..."
"Yes... er.. Detective Sergeant. Any help I can give."
"We have reason to believe two confidence tricksters are operating within this area. Confidence tricksters who have been robbing hotel residents by personating police officers."
"And..."
"We think they may be planning to target this hotel and specifically yourself next."
"Me? What makes you think that."
"Their MO. That’s what we call the way in which the criminal persona operates."
"Yes... modus operandi. I do watch police dramas on the television."
"Well, as I said, they are not that realistic. We don't strip girls naked and handcuff them for a start."
"No... I suppose not." Oh no! Fiona on reception had told her what I’d been watching. I bet they both had a laugh about it.
"Still if that’s what you enjoy... I’m sorry to interrupt your... Well, as I said these two tricksters have a fixed MO. They always target a Room 49. It seems to be a sort of talisman for them. And this is the sort of hotel they go for. Well off businessmen on their own if you know what I mean. Recently returned from abroad. They claim that their victim, if I can use such a word, their victim has committed some sort of crime, usually smuggling in drugs from their recent trip abroad. They flash a false warrant card. Nobody knows what a real warrant card looks like do they Sir?"
"I suppose not."
"Then they search the room, helping themselves to anything they fancy on the way. It’s a good con. The victim is too overawed to object and doesn’t notice anything is missing till they’re well gone. Are you willing to help?"
"Yes, of course," my ears were still burning so much with embarrassment that I felt unable to object even if they were talking a load of rubbish, "what do you want me to do?"
"Getting the evidence against them is the problem. I will place these hidden camera recording devices in your room..."
"They look like clocks?" She had pulled them out of her hold-all.
"They’re supposed to look like clocks. That’s what's meant by hidden."
"Yes, of course."
"Should these two women..."
"Women?"
"They are posing as women police officers..."
"Oh... I see..."
"Should they arrive I would like you to comply with everything they say. It’s absolutely imperative you do not do anything to make them suspect that we have determined there mode of operation. Do everything they say, just as you would for a real police officer. They may do things that a real police officer would not do, but you mustn’t raise any objections. Do you understand. It’s really important we get the necessary evidence. We'll be watching and listening to everything. When we have the evidence we'll move in. Do you understand?"
"Yes, of course."
Load of cobblers. Still if it kept her happy.
"Good! Remember... do everything they ask."
"Of course..."
"Good luck then. And enjoy the film. You were up to the bit where they had the cuffs on the naked girl and were just about to... Well I’m sure you’ll enjoy the next bit."
"Yes Officer..."
"Detective Sergeant..."
"Yes... Detective Sergeant..."
And she left.
Oh heck. I slipped the bathrobe off. What were they going to do with the naked girl! Gosh, they were... my hand went to my...
Ring ring!
Oh no! Bloody telephone again. Just when they'd had the girl over the table and were about to do an intimate... I took my hand away...
"Fiona on reception again. Good bit that isn’t it?"
"Sorry?"
"Better slip your bathrobe on again, there’s two police ladies on their way up now."
Oh gosh! They really had targeted me. I’d thought it was a whole load of nonsense and here they were. I glanced back at the screen where the naked girl was being marched outside. Just time for a quick...
**************
The idiot! I’d told him I’d planted two hidden cameras in the room and he’d gone straight back to wanking in front of the television. Didn’t he realise that we were watching and recording everything. What a nerd!
We could see him there stark naked with his cock in his hand watching the two cops march the naked girl out onto the street when the phone rang. Idiot. Still the girls masquerading as police officers were on the way up. Everything was set. He hastily put his bathrobe back on.
**************
Knock knock!
I answered the door.
"Police Constable Travis..."
"And Police Constable Rudd, may we come in."
They were uniformed police officers, both flashing what looked like warrant cards, but who knows what a police warrant card really looks like. The uniforms looked good though. In fact they looked good in their uniforms. A girl in a uniform always does something for me. Both were tall, one blonde, one brunette, short hair with firm but rather small breasts, taut buttocks and attractive faces. Well turned out. Slim. Looked like they spent some time in the gym.
"Enjoying the film?"
"Um.. yes..."
"Good. This is not a social call though."
"No I didn’t think..."
"You didn’t think we’d be on to you?"
"I didn’t mean..."
"Didn't mean to get caught. No, I don't suppose you did. You businessmen, think you can just travel everywhere and nobody notices... Well we have here a warrant to search this room for smuggled contraband..."
She flashed a bit of paper at me.
"But I..." then I remembered, I was to let them go ahead. "Yes, of course Officer."
"Judy, you search the room. I'll search the suspect."
"Yes Amanda."
"Search me?"
"Of course. The warrant covers a search of the person."
"The person?"
"Your person..."
"Yes, of course."
"If you could remove the bathrobe Sir."
"But I’ve..."
"You’ve got something hidden underneath it?"
"No I've got nothing..."
"Nothing to hide? In that case you won’t have any objections to a search."
"I meant I've got nothing on underneath."
"In that case the search will be much easier. Take it off please Sir."
"But they'll see...". The hidden cameras. They’d be watching and see me with nothing on. Oh my God! The hidden cameras! I’d forgotten all about them and I’d been watching the film and... they’d have seen everything and recorded everything.
"They’ll see what Sir?"
"I mean you'll see. I mean see me with nothing on."
"That is rather the point of a search of the person Sir. We have to see you with nothing on or you could be concealing something."
"But you’ll see my..."
"We will indeed Sir. That’s why we need this warrant."
"Surely the warrant doesn’t..."
"Oh yes it does..."
"Yes, of course...". I remembered that I had to do exactly as I was told, of the evidence. I removed the bathrobe. My ears were burning more than ever.
"On your knees with hands on your head Sir."
I knelt completely nude in the middle of the room with my hands on my head.
"Stand up and turn round slowly so we can see everything."
I turned round while the two girls stood hands on hips looking at my nude body. All of it.
"What did the report say about the suspect Judith."
"The left bollock hangs lower than the right Amanda."
"Better check then"
"But surely... ooow!'
I had been going to protest but she had grasped my balls and was squeezing tight.
"I think the left is definitely lower. See what you think."
The second girl, the one called Judith, grabbed my balls and squeezed tight.
"I don’t think...
"You don’t think it is? Better check again then hadn’t I?"
"But... ooow... I was going to say I don’t think anyone's right er... right one... hangs lower..."
"Well yours doesn’t... I think we have our man Judith. Cuff him..."
"What...". I gasped. With all this squeezing my penis had gone vertical.
"Eight inch cock. Cuff him. He’s our man."
"But...". Too late, my hands were pulled behind my back and handcuffed together.
"We haven’t found the stuff yet though have we..
"Too right we haven’t. Only one place it can be."
"Up his..."
"Over the table with him."
Hands cuffed behind my back and stark naked I couldn’t resist. I was held bent over the table with my face pressing into the table top.
"Spread your legs..."
"But...". surely they had enough evidence now!
**********
The girls had him handcuffed and over the table.
Ouch! I saw, was that two fingers going up, probably was from the look on his face. We were getting really good pictures. No point in stopping things. There was more to come yet!
**********
"No... I've got nothing..."
"Nothing up your er... orifice Sir? In that case you’ve nothing to worry about..."
"I was going to say nothing to.... ooooh! Ooooooooh!"
"Anything up there Amanda?"
"I don’t think so... would you like to confirm that"
"I think I’d better..."
"But you can’t... I gasped... You’re not real..."
"Not really going to find anything... well Judith will just make sure"
"Not real... aaaaaaaaah!" It was lucky she'd interrupted me. I was about to give the game away and I’d promised that I would go along with everything they said.
"Nothing there, we'll need to take him back to the station."
"The station! You mean the police station..."
"Well, we don’t mean the railway station do we?"
"But you can’t you..."
"This arrest warrant says we can."
She opened the door.
"But... But......" they must want me out the room so that I wouldn’t see what they were stealing. I had to go along with them or there wouldn’t be the necessary evidence.
"But what?"
"Er... Nothing. Can I put my bathrobe back on please."
"What... how do we do that with those cuffs on... out you go sonny boy."
And she pushed me through the door into the corridor. My mind was in a whirl. As I'm marched along the corridor, down the stairs, and paraded through the hotel lobby, past all the staring guests, completely nude.
"I see you got him then," said Fiona on the front desk, "put him on display."
I stared open mouthed my face burning with embarrassment.
"What’s that clock on the desk?" I asked.
"Oh," she said, "smile for the viewers please. That’s the hidden camera."
***********
A bit mean you’re thinking aren’t you. But when he pleasures himself watching that film I reckon he deserves all he gets don’t you? After all he got no more than the girl in the film gets - stripped, fondled, probed and displayed. I watched as the girls handcuffed him to the railings in the street. Displayed naked. A punishment to fit the crime don’t you think. Fiona always let us know when he was watching the film and after that it was easy. Men are so gullible! And our viewers did enjoy it.
***********
They managed to free me from the railings after a couple of hours. Quite a crowd had gathered by then. Apparently it was all a set up for some TV show. And you have to be a good sport don’t you. I mean they’d really made a spectacle of me there so I had to take it all in good part. And Fiona had been impressed. She’s offered me a part in her next film. Something about a dungeon and a whipping boy. I’m not quite sure what that is, but it sounds like fun.
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